it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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