tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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