We won't sleep together?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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