girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize