She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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