I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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