It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
