No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
