Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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