i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
