remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
