Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
