Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
That's when you crack a 10am beer
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
