I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
