Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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