That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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