You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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