Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
