we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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