i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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