rhymes with "ouble enetration"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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