I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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