Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
