I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize