Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
