I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
