I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize