so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
