I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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