I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
