you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
