Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
pop tarts are not kleenex
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
