hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
My vagina is very pro this idea
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
