I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
