Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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