talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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