dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
