yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize