You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
