You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
