just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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