Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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