she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
