69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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