Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
