Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
