First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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