what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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