I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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