So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
